Men of Redemption

Restoring a Life of Purity -One Day at a Time

Archive for June, 2015

Something Encouraging

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 30, 2015



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My Daily Word

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 30, 2015


“Does not wisdom cry out, And understanding lift up her voice? She takes her stand on the top of the high hill, Beside the way, where the paths meet. She cries out by the gates, at the entry of the city, At the entrance of the doors: “To you, O men, I call, And my voice is to the sons of men. O you simple ones, understand prudence, And you fools, be of an understanding heart. Listen, for I will speak of excellent things, And from the opening of my lips will come right things; For my mouth will speak truth; Wickedness is an abomination to my lips. All the words of my mouth are with righteousness; Nothing crooked or perverse is in them. They are all plain to him who understands, And right to those who find knowledge. Receive my instruction, and not silver, And knowledge rather than choice gold; For wisdom is better than rubies, And all the things one may desire cannot be compared with her.”  –  PROVERBS 8:1-11

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Something Encouraging

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 29, 2015

oscar wilde

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My Daily Word

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 29, 2015


“As the deer pants for the water brooks, So pants my soul for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my food day and night, While they continually say to me, “Where is your God?” When I remember these things, I pour out my soul within me. For I used to go with the multitude; I went with them to the house of God, With the voice of joy and praise, With a multitude that kept a pilgrim feast. Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him For the help of His countenance. O my God, my soul is cast down within me; Therefore I will remember You from the land of the Jordan, And from the heights of Hermon, From the Hill Mizar. Deep calls unto deep at the noise of Your waterfalls; All Your waves and billows have gone over me. The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, And in the night His song shall be with me—A prayer to the God of my life. I will say to God my Rock, “Why have You forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?” As with a breaking of my bones, My enemies reproach me, While they say to me all day long, “Where is your God?” Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.”  –  PSALM 42:1-11

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My Question Is . . . .

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 26, 2015

My Question Is . . . . my question

“My husband is in recovery and he’s getting the help he needs. But I’m having a hard time understanding how he’s getting all this help and I’m the victim. Is there help for us wives who have been the recipient of our husbands addictive behaviors?”

Yes there is! There are many valuable resources and support groups for wives who have been the victims of their husbands’ addictive behaviors. Most wives don’t understand that they too need support, ministering and accountability in this battle that their husbands are going through. You, the wives, are the first in line to receive the residual effects of his behaviors, and they can be very disastrous. Once this happens, like you, many wives are fearful, not knowing what to do or who they can turn to. You have best friends but many wives don’t feel comfortable talking about their husband’s issues because they wouldn’t understand or don’t think they can relate.

The resources are out there, from books on understanding your husbands’ secret wars to Christian counselors whose expertise specializes in this area. There are also good support groups for wives in the battle that meet once or twice a week, and they talk and share about what their husbands are going through and even take a serious look at themselves to see if there is some concerns that they may need to address. But wives can not try to deal with being left out as their husbands get the help they need. Your need for support and understanding is just as important, if not, more important. It is also vital that you look into your local church and see if they have a ministry that’s committed to helping spouses who have been victims of addictive behaviors, sometimes noted under family or marriage ministry. So don’t stick your head in the sand because of embarrassment or lack of understanding, make a stand and reach out. There are also organizations online with excellent support services as well.


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Something Encouraging

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 26, 2015


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My Daily Word

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 26, 2015


“For we know that if our earthly house, this tent, is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. For in this we groan, earnestly desiring to be clothed with our habitation which is from heaven, if indeed, having been clothed, we shall not be found naked. For we who are in this tent groan, being burdened, not because we want to be unclothed, but further clothed, that mortality may be swallowed up by life. Now He who has prepared us for this very thing is God, who also has given us the Spirit as a guarantee. So we are always confident, knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord. For we walk by faith, not by sight. We are confident, yes, well pleased rather to be absent from the body and to be present with the Lord.”  –   2 CORINTHIANS 5:1-8

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My Question Is . . . .

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 25, 2015

my question

My Question Is . . . .

“I’m looking for a support group that’s going to meet me right where I am in my struggles. How do I determine which group is for me and my specific struggles?” 

As you may already know, there are many support groups out there for both men and women, ranging from the least struggles in life to the extreme addictive behaviors that have overtaken so many and they don’t even realize it. I believe one of the very first things we must do is identify precisely what it is that we are specifically struggling with. Ask yourself these three questions:

1). What is my struggle or behavior centered around?

2). Is my behavior(s) causing hurt or damage to my relationships, family, friends, co-workers, spouse?

3). Am I ready to get some help now before things get worse?

When you can answer these questions truthfully and honestly, you have a good indication that there is a problem, and you need to seek out help or assistance from someone who is familiar or has been through what you’re going through and has overcome the same struggles you’re presently in. There are many support groups out there who will say we can or will help you in your struggles, that they are equipped with the latest information regarding your specific needs, but when you arrive and see for yourself you find that it is not the case. These groups tend to be groups that are focused on emotional and mental support, which are good for those who need that type of support. But if you’re struggling with, say, addictive behaviors, sexual integrity issues, lust, porn, affairs, etc., then your search for help becomes limited and that’s where you need to be very careful in seeking out your anticipated help. Here are some criteria we introduce to those who are seeking help in their struggles, specifically with sexual integrity issues.

A. We specifically work with those who struggle, are struggling or have struggled with sexual integrity and want to live in freedom.

B. Our group will walk with you every step of the way in your journey, providing the essential needs of recovery; accountability, honest and transparent men of faith who are overcoming in these areas as living examples of our mission to freedom.

C. We will establish daily contact, if needed, in accountability efforts via phone calls, visitations, emails, etc., to meet you exactly where you are in your struggles.

D. You will never be left alone trying to overcome by yourself; we will be there for you 24/7.

E. Our curriculum that we used is authored by some of the best experts in the field, with examples of verifiable recovery testimonies from those who have overcome and want to show you how you too, can overcome daily, one step at a time.

These are some of the criteria we at Men of Redemption use as we work with men to help them in their struggles. Now, your specific struggle or issue may not be in this immediate area. But whatever it is, know for sure that what you are dealing with, or what is dealing with you, it will require more that what you’re looking for and that’s hands-on, in your face, challenging you to be real and honest in your desire to be set free from your struggles. That group you’re looking for or into should be established, having integrity and transparency as pillars of a foundational truth included in their purpose and mission statement. Why so much information and detail for a good support group? Because it’s your life at stake. Everything that exemplifies who you are: your character, your mindset, your thoughts, your heart, your integrity, and everything you say and do for the rest of your life is resting on the opportunity to bring that blessed hope to your life and to walk in a new-found freedom. That group should be focused on doing whatever it takes to get you there. That group should also have established a good and verifiable history of men and women whose lives have demonstrated that the group and it’s process has and is working in their lives currently. So you have to be very careful in selecting a support group. You want the best help out there, and there are plenty of good groups that are doing some wonderful work in helping men and women. But using wisdom, the spiritual guidance of those who have been there to help educate, give understanding and direction will assist you tremendously. There it is there my friends.

“Brethren, if anyone among you wanders from the truth, and someone turns him back, let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save a soul from death and cover a multitude of sins.”  –  James 5:19, 20

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My Daily Word

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 25, 2015


“If you instruct the brethren in these things, you will be a good minister of Jesus Christ, nourished in the words of faith and of the good doctrine which you have carefully followed. But reject profane and old wives’ fables, and exercise yourself toward godliness. For bodily exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come. This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance. For to this end we both labor and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Savior of all men, especially of those who believe. These things command and teach. Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity. Till I come, give attention to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine. Do not neglect the gift that is in you, which was given to you by prophecy with the laying on of the hands of the eldership. Meditate on these things; give yourself entirely to them, that your progress may be evident to all. Take heed to yourself and to the doctrine. Continue in them, for in doing this you will save both yourself and those who hear you.”  –  1 TIMOTHY 4:6-16

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My Question Is . . . .

Posted by Men of Redemption on June 24, 2015

my question

My Question Is . . . .

“What’s the difference between change and transformation? I attend a support group and I hear those words all the time. Aren’t they the same?” 

First of all, let’s look at the definition of both words.

Change: to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone.”

When we look at the word change from a recovery standpoint, change can be misconstrued as doing something different, getting away from something old and non-productive and moving into something new and challenging. In most support group settings this is the common approach to helping men and women with various struggles and issues of life. Most people prefer change because it shows the world that the outside of an individual can change, and that’s what most people want to see is the outward change of a person. But that can be so easily deceiving, based on what the person who is changing wants to “display” to his or her audience. They can appear to be in control and will change to accommodate, or conform to the wishes or desires of his environment, sort of what a chameleon does when his environment changes.

Transformation: “the act, or the state of being transformed; change in form, appearance, nature, or character.”

When we talk about transformation, we looking at change as well, but from an internal perspective. Yes, change is involved, but it is from within. When we say from within, we’re speaking of a heart and mind change. Transformation involves a renewing of the mind through the eradication of ungodly thoughts, selfishness, egotistical values of me-first. Also a heart change is closely followed with the mind because the mind begins to think more clearly, and will affect how we feel about things and others. Transformation from within is something you can’t modify to accommodate others or appease others. Once transformation takes place it gives you a new character, new perspectives on life, a new nature, and you can’t hide and make that up. It’s inside you, and what’s inside of you will surely come out eventually.

So if you’re in a support group and you’re looking for something that will make a difference in your life and the ones that you have affected in some way or another, consider transformation because you want the freedom that’s genuine from the heart, not to appease others then return to your past thoughts and behaviors.

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”  –  ROMANS 12:1, 2


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